A few weeks back I saw the film Gandhi My Father which follows the relationship between Mahatma Gandhi (Darshan Jariwala) and his eldest son Harilal Gandhi (Akshaye Khanna). Initially Harilal makes every effort to fulfill his father's wishes. He joins him in South Africa leaving his pregnant wife behind. He is the first volunteer who accepts all the charges leveled against him in court and decides to spend time in jail instead of agreeing to pay a fine. On returning Harilal continues to work for his father. But when despite that Gandhi ji sends twice someone else on scholarship to London for studying law, a lifelong dream of Harilal's, he feels let down. Disgruntled and unwilling to follow his father's footsteps the son decides to go a separate way.
Harilal's life goes through a series of troughs and ridges with the downs lasting much longer. Whenever things seem to be going well the tide suddenly changes. He is unable to his live up to his earlier reputation of Chota Gandhi. Even his wife who initially stands behind him later on leaves Harilal as he takes to drinking and other bad habits. Over the years Harilal is involved in cases of embezzlement in the place he was working and duping innocent people using his father's name. Gandhi ji finally legally disassociates himself from any of Harilal's future activities. While advising a victim to lodge a police complaint against Harilal, Gandhi ji questions sadly that as a father he has done a lot for his son but how long can he go on saving him from his misadventures.
The film ends with showing that Harilal starts living like a vagabond and dies in a hospital a destitute, with no family member near him to hold his hands, a few months after Gandhi ji's assassination.
Who is to blame for Harilal's sorry state? Initially the father seems responsible for the son's disillusionment. Gandhi ji's philosophy that there are more important things to learn in life than getting an education keeps his son away from becoming a barrister. But when Harilal is allowed to lead life his own way, he fails to acquire the degree. He gets involved in wrong doings sometimes by pure naivety. Surely, the onus cannot be put on his father on these occasions.
In the film Baghban when the parents (Amitabh Bachchan and Hema Malini) are separated at the hands of their children and are even horribly mistreated by them, the mother questions whether somewhere she was responsible for her children turning out this way. Her husband disagrees and says that each person is accountable for his/her own acts.
I therefore appreciate Geet's (Kareena Kapoor) philosophy in Jab We Met. She admits that life is her favorite game and whatever decisions she takes are her own so that later on she doesn't regret missing out on something. Geet acknowledges at the same time that even if she falls in trouble for her actions it will be because of the choices that she made and not somebody else.
Harilal's life goes through a series of troughs and ridges with the downs lasting much longer. Whenever things seem to be going well the tide suddenly changes. He is unable to his live up to his earlier reputation of Chota Gandhi. Even his wife who initially stands behind him later on leaves Harilal as he takes to drinking and other bad habits. Over the years Harilal is involved in cases of embezzlement in the place he was working and duping innocent people using his father's name. Gandhi ji finally legally disassociates himself from any of Harilal's future activities. While advising a victim to lodge a police complaint against Harilal, Gandhi ji questions sadly that as a father he has done a lot for his son but how long can he go on saving him from his misadventures.The film ends with showing that Harilal starts living like a vagabond and dies in a hospital a destitute, with no family member near him to hold his hands, a few months after Gandhi ji's assassination.
Who is to blame for Harilal's sorry state? Initially the father seems responsible for the son's disillusionment. Gandhi ji's philosophy that there are more important things to learn in life than getting an education keeps his son away from becoming a barrister. But when Harilal is allowed to lead life his own way, he fails to acquire the degree. He gets involved in wrong doings sometimes by pure naivety. Surely, the onus cannot be put on his father on these occasions.
In the film Baghban when the parents (Amitabh Bachchan and Hema Malini) are separated at the hands of their children and are even horribly mistreated by them, the mother questions whether somewhere she was responsible for her children turning out this way. Her husband disagrees and says that each person is accountable for his/her own acts.
I therefore appreciate Geet's (Kareena Kapoor) philosophy in Jab We Met. She admits that life is her favorite game and whatever decisions she takes are her own so that later on she doesn't regret missing out on something. Geet acknowledges at the same time that even if she falls in trouble for her actions it will be because of the choices that she made and not somebody else.
In our lives too we take many decisions. Those particularly related to career and marriage knowingly and unknowingly get influenced by our family's thoughts. But even if its the former case, I believe that ultimately we should ourselves shoulder the responsibility of the decision made and its consequences thereafter. We should stop saying all the time that "I did this for my parents, siblings, wife/husband or children."
Whatever the reason the choice is always ours. So grin and bear.
2 comments:
deep philosophy, very true though, well written!!
thanks manish!
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