My first year in Uppsala

I was torn apart between writing this post now and keeping it for the new year. After a bit of tussle I decided to go with the first option. The fact that I have been away from blogging for a while also worked in its favor. So here I am rewinding back to the days gone by.

My Arrival in Uppsala had not been an easy one. This had nothing to do with my flights, but with the long time it took to receive my new passport as Police Verification traversed three cities: Chennai, Pune and Delhi. When I finally managed to get it in hand I immediately applied for a Swedish Work Permit. Though the decision came in my inbox within three weeks it took some days to get it stamped on my passport as it had to be sent to Delhi. My woes did not end and the passport mailed through a courier service met with a further delay. It was a near photo finish as I eventually got hold of my prized possession with only the weekend to spare before my departure. The two days were precious as packing efficiently was key without any extra baggage allowance.

Settling in Uppsala was easy thanks to some acquaintances I had made while I was still in Chennai. They showed me the ropes and I was soon on my own. The fact that a change of events had led me to be a part of the research group I would have wanted to in an ideal situation cheered me. The cold weather in some inexplicable way warmed my heart towards the city and I felt at home without which I would have found it difficult to live alone for a long stretch of time. This besides, preparing for someone's arrival during Christmas holidays for three weeks added to the excitement.

Partings and meetings with my husband happened every few months whenever he had a break before the start of a new course semester. It was the time in between that was a test for both of us. Barring the few occasions requiring a complaint report, we did our best to not be demanding. What was important was to keep each other abreast of our daily lives which had got separated having to reside in two different countries. Even in absence the other person's presence was made to feel, the knowledge of which brought in a sense of security.

Temperature monitoring was of supreme importance throughout the winter season which lasted until March end. I remember returning from UK then to be welcomed by the sight of vanished snow. I was fascinated to see that even after weathering terrible conditions the grass grew, the trees got their leaves back and flowers bloomed all around on their own when summer arrived. I don't think I have ever appreciated nature and its beauty in this manner before.

Drawing comparisons with conditions back home happened inevitably. Consider something as basic as a bus ride. I still feel horrified recalling my 15-20 min journeys from home in Pune to NCL and back during my PhD. The buses would always be extremely crowded in the morning with everyone going towards the city for work and I had to fight my way through the length of the bus to reach the exit when my stop came at the cost of mercilessly stepping on people's toes. The evenings were no different with people returning home. Worse still some buses wouldn't stop requiring me to wait for another 45 minutes for the next round.
         
Commuting within Uppsala and around is really smooth. The buses are mostly on schedule and if delayed then only by a few minutes. A combined timetable for all the buses is freely distributed. On the ul.se site you can even type in your starting point and destination to find out which buses can be boarded at a given time. The heavy traffic and high population in India are perhaps deterrents for implementation of such a disciplined scheme.
         

You never hear about deaths due to cold even when temperatures dip much more than say in New Delhi (-20 deg C vs 4 deg C). Stricken with poverty people in India sleep on the roads and huddle themselves around small bonfires to keep warm while some families live in tents with little to protect. Homes, offices, and public transport have excellent heating systems and its as good as 20-25 deg C inside there confines.
         
What I miss is the excitement and furor revolving around various events happening in my motherland. For instance, our Indian Cricket Team bringing home the World Cup after a long wait. The support and fasting along with Team Anna. The debating over the various scams. The dandias at Navratri. The firecrackers at Diwali. The release of the 160 crore Ra.One. I miss even the crowds and the hustle-bustle.

Any differences from this time last year? We can do without wearing woolen gloves and caps. Much to my surprise the temperature is yet to drop below zero deg C. I am almost wishing for it to snow but mostly sunny days have been forecast for the next fortnight. A major change is I am back with my husband and happy days are here again. (*crossing my fingers*)


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PS: How was your first year or for that matter trip of any length outside your home country? Was the transition easy? For those who have been away for longer how does it feel now?

In your dreams

99.9% of times I see dreams when I sleep. My constant complaint is that on waking up in the morning I feel as if I have been working all night.

The usual setting for my dreams is my school building or playground, my IIT Bombay hostel and home in India. Those making appearances in my dreams include family, friends, colleagues from work, people I haven't seen or thought about for years, random unknown faces, and even film or soap actors. The latter invariably happens over weekends as a result of my being glued to the tv for too long.

I had one of my scariest dreams just a few days before the Class X Board Exams were going to take place. I saw all my teeth crumbling into tiny pieces and when I covered my mouth they fell into my palms! One early morning in January 2009 in a rare happening I woke up crying continuing the flow of tears from the dream. Months after I had successfully given my Ph.D. viva I found myself floundering at answering the questions posed by the committee in my nightmare.

Such visions can easily be attributed to my fears and insecurities during those periods. But what about the cases when I see myself doing things I am incapable of doing (as of this moment) in life. For example, I do not know how to cycle. I do not know how to ride a scooty. I had learnt driving a car once up on a time but lost the confidence on Pune roads and no longer remember now even the order of accelerator, brake and clutch. I do not know how to swim. I definitely am no Krrish.

Yet in my nightly illusions I just pick up a cycle or get on a bike and am able to balance it without any issues. I find myself having fun floating in those Waterworld kind of pools. On other occasions I see myself riding on huge waves. Once I got inside what was in the beginning a plane and later turned into a spherical capsule but really enormous. The way it traveled was very much like this scene in the animation movie Robots when Rodney arrives in Robot City and goes to meet his idol Bigweld. A few days back I was flying around from one part of the school field to another. It was as if I had gained some superpowers.

As much as I'd like to have a relaxed slumber, these particular action packed specters of the mind-boggling type tell me that if only we believe then like in our dreams in our daily affairs too we would be able to do things above and beyond what me may normally percieve ourselves to be capable of.

So dream on.

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PS: What kind of dreams do you have?

A Midsummer Night's Dream

Occasionally I like to “ego surf” on Google. In the process today I came across this link on my school website. It brought back memories when I was in Class IX. One morning it was announced in the assembly that a school production would be staged. It was going to be a Hindi adaptation of Shakespeare's A Midsummer Night's Dream (Grishm ki madhya ratri ka swapn).

The play was to be helmed by Mr. Alok Chatterjee, belonging to the well-known National School of Drama (NSD). Though I was quite shy in those days I tagged along with friends for the audition. The process for selection was new to me and it felt exciting.

In the first round all the students were asked to form small groups. Then each group had to improvise a skit on a theme allotted to it. At the end of the day students who managed to impress were called for a second round. Each of these students was then asked by the Director to read out from the script the dialogue of a character. Based on this performance a student was selected for a particular role.

I wish I could tell you that I got a plum role. Sadly I can’t. I possibly got what was the smallest of them all. I was to be one of the fairies who come along with the character Puck, the elf. I was upset and all the initial excitement disappeared. I think it was my sister who encouraged me to continue and it turned out wonderfully. No, my role didn’t become any bigger. I did get one whole dialogue assigned later. But like they say sometimes it is about the experience.

The general routine was that every day after school hours all the participants would collect in the school hall. There we would be first served hot lunch. Then practice would start and go on until 4 pm after which special school buses would drop us home.

On the first day we began from the first page of the script. This session and the few to follow were bad. The students had not learnt dialogues since it was all new. As a result the feelings wouldn’t come when you are concentrating on just reading.

I remember the whole atmosphere changed with the arrival of our second hero Demetrius. The student acting out this character came thoroughly prepared. Even though it was going to be his first time practicing he had memorized his dialogues. He brought in a vigor and professionalism. He became the benchmark from there on.

Things had been going well for some days when the bomb exploded. An extra practice session had been arranged on a Saturday following a Parents-Teacher meeting. All but one of the girls playing the lead character of Hermia did not arrive on time. An angry Mr. Alok Chatterjee on the spur of the moment asked someone else, who turned out to be my very good friend Kamakshi, to take over. Half an hour later the student in question reached the hall and was left aghast finding herself replaced. Lots of hot words and tears later peace was restored. But by then the damage had been done. Kamakshi had done splendidly and was there to stay.

The play started taking a better shape after we had a short school break. It seemed all the actors had taken advantage of the holiday to learn their dialogues. So the focus shifted on the movement on stage and adding actions. Simultaneously other departments were doing their jobs. Props were being arranged. Costumes were getting stitched. When there would be nothing to do, we girls would make use of the empty school and play antakshri (singing medley of Hindi film songs) and some would dance all the Madhuri Dixit moves.

Before we knew the dates of the actual performances came knocking. We were going to do four shows in two days – 24th and 25th October, 1994. The first day was to be an evening show. The next day would be a roller-coaster with us staging the play thrice. We all arrived well in advance at the Kamani Auditorium, Delhi. Seeing the big stage and the huge seating capacity sent chills. To top it there were going to be no microphones and we would have to rely on our vocal chords. Everybody was given a chance to test the loudness of their voice. We had people stand in different corners of the theatre to tell us if they could hear us or not. For the first time I was happy that I had only one line to recite. The best thing was that unlike movies the size of the role did not determine the treatment. We were very well taken care of by our school staff.

On 24th October eve among the audience were going to be the participating students’ family members making it all the more important for no mess ups. When the first time people clapped for a scene during the performance it brought smiles to our faces. There was a relief that the play was connecting with the audience. Overall that night I don’t think any mistakes were made. After the whole act was over, all the parents came backstage including mine. I could see their happiness writ over their faces. Mummy was all glowing even for that little part I did and I felt myself swelling with pride.

Our Director however brought us down to earth reminding of what lay ahead the next day. It was to be a real test as the audience was going to consist of school students from classes VI to XII. We knew that there would be no special reprieve in case we faltered. There were a few scary moments. Once one of the characters improvised a dialogue he had forgotten. Only we realized what had happened. I myself suddenly had my throat drying while speaking or was it screeching which Mr. Alok Chatterjee pointed out to me after the performance. But instead of feeling upset I actually felt good hearing that as it made me realize he didn’t consider my part insignificant.

Finally the last bow was taken on the night of 25th October. We were all happy that we sailed through. All those ups and downs had been worth it. Our eyes were dancing with joy, until we were hit by the fact that from now on it would be back to normal life with nothing beyond classes to look forward to.

The sudden pang of emptiness in my stomach made me realize that I had managed to accumulate for myself some priceless memories through this little journey.

(Source of photos: Delhi Public School, Mathura Road. The photos above are pages of the brochure that was printed for the play to be distributed to the audience.)

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PS: Does anyone remember this? Would you like to share any of your such experiences?

Morning school assemblies

Yesterday was my Ph.D. viva and it made me ask myself the question when was the first time I had spoken on a platform. The answer was in class fifth. From the faint memories I have of that time I recall that during an English lesson I had recited a poem from our reader titled "Abou ben Adam". My teacher was rather pleased and felt I should give a repeat performance in the school's morning assembly. She had to specially take permission from the Junior School (classes Nursery-V) Headmistress to allow me to speak. I practised quite hard and it paid off. When the moment arrived I managed to deliver without faltering.

In Middle School (classes VI-VIII) and Senior School (classes IX-XII) the format of the assemblies was different. Every day the assembly was conducted by students of one of the houses (Chenab, Ganga, Sutlej, Ravi, Yamuna and Jhelum) of the school. It would have to include a thought for the day, followed by the morning news, scripture reading and then speech. I spoke on many occasions and even enjoyed it, sometimes speaking because I wanted to and sometimes for filling in for a student gone absent.

A few years after I passed out of my alma mater I heard that barring a few special assemblies this morning ritual had been stopped. While some of my friends rejoiced at this news, I thought it was sad. Agreed because of the school timings and the extreme weather in Delhi we used to find ourselves either sweating in the sweltering heat or shivering in the biting cold in the huge playground. But it also gave us the chance to gossip with friends, exchange notes with students of other sections, and to look at awe at all the seniors and dream about growing up. It used to be a proud moment when receiving a certificate or a prize from the hands of a chief guest in front of such a huge audience.

For going to debating or recitation competitions one always needed the backing of teachers who had the necessary authority. But for speaking in assemblies there was full freedom. If you had the willingness then all you had to do was express your interest to the House Captains and they'd happily give you the next immediately available chance.

For me it was through such experiences that I gained confidence, developed public speaking skills and managed to get over stage fright. I, therefore, fervently wish that this practice of morning assemblies is brought back to schools and continued so that young students who are otherwise shy learn to shed their inhibitions and take pride in themselves.

Status update

This post is to update you on the recent events in my life which have kept me away from blogging.

Going in order of occurence, I completed writing my Ph.D thesis, got printed eight volumes of it with my name embossed in golden letters, and finally submitted the thesis in the university. The submission process thankfully went smoothly. Having accomplished the goal for which I had first joined NCL made me relieved and happy and at the same time also left me feeling empty. The only way to go ahead now is to aim for new and higher targets and walk on untrodden paths.

The other joyous occasion which took place was my wedding. I enjoyed all the celebrations and festivities in which we were joined by our families and friends. Marriage has brought some changes with it. A change from Miss to Mrs. A change of residence. A change of even the city of residence. And most importantly a change in waking up habits. :-p I am learning a lot of things and by that I don't simply mean cooking. What keeps me going when I almost lose it is the loving, caring, and helpful husband I have who on these occasions has more patience than me. :-)

Fare thee well

Today as someone told me that he had packed his bags and was ready to shift into a new home, the time when I had bid farewell to my IITB Hostel-10 days flashed before my eyes.

I had collected so many things in those two years of M.Sc. in my small hostel room that I didn't know where to begin packing. So I did what I always do in times of trouble and that was ask for help from my elder sister. She came all the way from Delhi to Mumbai taking leave from office. In those two days I did nothing but look on as she went on doing her job. She even found time to treat me and my friends at Birdy's Pizza and Uttam Da Dhaba.

This year I'll be saying my bye-byes to NCL and will be moving to Bangalore. There are paraphernalia that I have kept safely with me since I was a kid such as school journals, English reader books, my favourite Sanskrit notes, my Aamir Khan scrapbooks and hundreds of his photos, gifts and cards received from friends, all my registers and books and photocopies from college till date, then several novels starting from Five Find-outers, and finally the photo albums carrying all the memories.

Once again I find myself clueless about how to go about performing this elephantine task. What is likely to make packing my belongings still more difficult this time is the mixed feelings I am going to have. It will be like a seesaw of emotions with the sadness associated with adieus pulling me down and the excitement of starting a new phase of my life lifting me up.

Blogger's block

I have been wanting to write for ages and I did attempt to put a post since my last one but didn't succeed in coming up with something substantial. This perhaps or really is related to the happenings in my life beginning November 2008 onwards.

Many important events have taken place following 01.01.2009 and many more are to occur in the coming months. The time in between these special occasions is spent in counting this in between time first as months, then days, and finally hours. The only thing that keeps me going and that makes me happy and anxious together, is looking at my watch and seeing its hands move. Nothing else excites me more than striking out each day off my calendar until that wonderful date arrives. Nothing besides this interests me either.

Today my life seems to be centered around one focal point but this has only brought me joy in leaps and bounds.

I have received so much that suffering from blogger's block is a very small price that I am paying. :-)

Bangalore tales (1): Doing science in India

Last month I got a chance to attend two conferences in Bangalore and thanks to both had the joy of listening to two very passionate speakers.

Prof. C. N. R. Rao of Jawaharlal Nehru Centre of Advanced Scientific Research, Bangalore and Scientific Adviser to our Prime Minister delivered a public lecture on "Doing science in India: How to succeed!" He spoke with just the perfect blend of lightheartedness and gravity. I also had the pleasure of having a discussion on a similar topic with my Boss during the flight while on our way to the second conference.

The two learned scientists said in their own ways that if you want to do well in research then firstly you must choose an interesting topic to work in. If you are in an area of significance then half your battle is won. Once there you've got to plunge into it and attempt for breakthroughs which is not easy in a highly competitive field. Over the years you should build your expertise in a particular subject while also trying your hand at other research problems. It seems that in science being a master of one is better than being a jack of all trades. Also one must never forget the age old rule of publish or perish.

But publishing a number of papers and getting invited to give lectures does not necessarily mean you've achieved success. Success in my Boss's terminology is a synonym for respect and from whom that respect is coming makes all the difference in the world. The day someone of stature in your key research area has kind words to say about you is a day you can surely rejoice.

To new "beginnings"

Christmas is over and we have now come to that part of 2008 when everybody is looking forward to the new year. Everybody at this time is reminiscing all that happened in the past twelve months. However bad the bygone 365 days might have been everybody is hopeful of the tide changing with the setting of January the First. There's a vigor, excitement and desire to start some projects afresh and to bring others to completion.

2008 has so far been very good to me. Two of my papers got published with a third one waiting to be uploaded soon. Instead of one stamp on my passport, I got two! I presented an invited lecture at an international conference. On the personal front I was gifted with a niece who filled my life with happiness. I found a certain precious thing I'd never had and threw away that no longer held any meaning.

I am now waiting with bated breath for 2009 to arrive. I have a simple two-point plan.

Someone very wise told me "You set your own standards." I am going to remind myself to always place the bar high. To try and do the best I can.

In the film The Holiday, Miles (Jack Black) says to Iris (Kate Winslet), "Iris if you were a melody... I'd use only the good notes." That is what I want to do... use only the good notes... make the sweetest melody.

:)

Complimentary service

I don't know of any girl who is not pleased when served with a compliment. I too love to hear good things about myself. Getting commended for my work or receiving showers of praises by a friend always brings a smile to my face.

Today I got my best compliment ever and I liked it so much that I am sharing it here to celeberate my 200th post and to boast about myself. :)

Read on to find out how it came about....

X=: tell me how many guys are so lively... very few
TK: i wouldnt use the word lively... mad and crazy perhaps :p
and yeah u r one of the few such guys
and somehow u r very decent too
how did this combination happen? :)
X=: Unique again ;)
TK: :p bragging bragging!! kamse kam use a different word for unique :D
X=: :) Tuhina
TK: kya?
X=: :P
TK: thats the different word ? :D ok.. now i am bragging

Yesterday, today, tomorrow

Yesterday I found saying to myself that eventhough my Singapore official tour was nearing I was feeling not even close to excitement. Ofcourse I had jumped with joy on finally getting my visa and buying my tickets which was just last week but was somehow looking like ages ago. The fact that I couldn't find anything nice in Westside when I went shopping in the evening further dampened my spirits.

Today is a new story all together. My Boss had told me a couple of days back that since he was not going for the conference he had suggested to the organizers to let me speak on his behalf. But I wasn't sure they would agree since Sir's was an invited talk and not a regular oral presentation. So it came as a pleasant surprise when Sir told me in the morning that the organizers had actually consented. Further, the icing on the cake was they were letting me talk for the entire 30 min originally alloted to Sir for his invited lecture.

I realized that this indeed is going to be a great oppourtunity for me and a great responsibility as I'll be filling in for my Boss. I am finally beginning to feel goosebumps. To add to the mounting pressure this will be my first international oral presentation!!

Watching and listening to the various speakers during WATOC made me wonder when will I get a chance to be on stage. I could not have then imagined for it to happen so soon. I am really glad and grateful that my Boss not only thought but also took the initiative of suggesting my name.

As a result I am now worrying about tomorrow. Or rather about 11.45am, 5 November, 2008 the time at which my presentation is scheduled.

Everyone, please cross your fingers for me so that all goes well that day. :)

Aadat ho chuki hai

I've always wondered why is it so difficult for people to give up their addictions for smoking. What initially starts of as a way to give thrill or to just look cool later becomes a habit or aadat. Besides such addictions some of us have irritating habits such as biting nails, picking nose (ew! gross!), moving legs constantly due to restlessness, etc.

It turns out that over the last few years I myself had developed one habit, which I am not going to reveal. What I'll willingly disclose is that its suddenly happened to disappear. I was so used to this thing that I am not feeling myself anymore. I should actually be happy to have done away with something that was occupying a lot of my time. But now that its gone I don't know what to do in these newly found free hours.

I am unable to decide whether I should fill this emptiness with something new or just let it be.

Can't hardly wait!

I can't hardly wait for one of my new year wishes of getting a stamp on my passport to come true. In a few hours from now I leave for Sydney to attend the 8th Triennial World Association of Theoretical and Computational Chemists (WATOC) 2008. Along with presenting my work to an international audience and interacting with students and experts in my field, I also intend to do loads of sightseeing. Months back I had bought The Rough Guide to Sydney and have been reading it like a bedtime story book the past few weeks. I already know what I want to do, where all I want to visit, and what all I want to eat there.

Its a different thing that even after all the preparations I am feeling rather apprehensive about it. I guess I have waited for this for so long and have pictured a million things happening including meeting Aaaaakaaash (Aamir Khan's character in DCH who goes to Sydney!) on the flight that I am wondering how it will all eventually turn out.

I have heard that I needn't worry about it because during my stay I will for sure be falling in love... with the city. Sydney is supposed to be very me. In summary it will be laid back and beautiful. ;-)

Refresher course (3)

Here are two more refreshed posts for you:

1. Spin-a-yarn: Click on the title to go to the post. The original one was titled Story Behind a Picture and has been kept as it is below the new version.

2. From fat to slim (4): exercising: Click on the title to go to the post. Unlike my other posts where content was inadequate, here it was in plenty and so I decided to modify it.

Sweet cherry

This post is dedicated to my niece Mandavi who recently turned 5 months old and came visiting us in Pune all the way from her home in Bangalore. Her journey began on a good note. My sister told me that Mandavi gave lots of people smiles at the Bangalore airport and in the plane.

The first time that I saw my niece in Pune was in this restuarant near my work place where my sister and brother-in-law had dropped in to have coffee. My first reaction was "ki yeh kitni badi ho gayi hai!" (since my last trip to Bangalore which was in March). She was sleeping very sweetly when I reached the restuarant but soon woke up and she gave an equally sweet smile! My day was made instantly. But there was more to come. My sister asked me hold the baby something which I hadn't done earlier on account of her being too small. Mandavi happily came in my arms. This brief milaap (meeting) had to be broken because I had to return to work. But the same evening my sister and Mandavi dropped in at home for a few hours. This time Mandavi was propped in my lap as I sat on my bed and she enjoyed my company. My sister happily told everyone from then on that there is a special connection between Maushi and niece.

The next day was rather hectic for Mandavi as we had invited many of our relatives for lunch. Everyone wanted to take over the baby. Surprisingly our baby didn't cry even once and braved it all. But when her father left Pune for a conference and Mandavi and my sister moved into our home it was enough for her. Finding a change of place and being unable to find her father around had her unsettled so much so that even when my sister left her alone with us for a few seconds Mandavi would start crying very badly. It made me feel so terrible as Daddy and my efforts in pacifying her went in vain. What made it worse for me was that I had hardly ever seen her cry like this. Still worse was when finally my sister managed to get her to fall asleep and as I closed a door (which I was worried would bang because of the wind) it creaked and Mandavi got up because of the noise and started crying.

In the following 2-3 days Mandavi had started bonding with Daddy. During the day she would nicely go into his lap and fall asleep. But there had to be pin drop silence or else she would get up. In the evenings we started taking her for a walk. It turned out that Mandavi is an outdoor child because she would just become peaceful what with there being a cool breeze and lots to see around. Just when we thought things had improved we had another round of visitors. My friends, Daddy's friends and relatives who wanted some personal time with Mandavi came over. It was only when the weekend came and it was just us that my niece could breathe easily.

I learnt a lot during that weekend. For example. How to change the baby's diaper? How to put her clothes on? Both these jobs are difficult when you are a novice and the baby is in an excited mood constantly moving her arms and legs. Most importantly I learnt talking to a 5 month old baby. This is a different ball game from talking to a 1.5 month old baby. You have to find tricks to keep the baby engaged since now the baby is mostly awake. You have to find songs that the baby loves but not overuse it as Daddy did because it spoils the effects. Mandavi's favourites are lakdi ki kathi, phoolon ka taaron ka and kukubara sits on an old gum tree. This involves some trial and error. Like one day we were listening to FM. Whenever in the song "Chak de phatte" would come Mandavi would start laughing. We have reserved slow songs and music to put her off to sleep and fast numbers when she is active. She loved it when I did some actions with the songs. My sister had come up with sing-songs of her own which she sang on particular times like massaging the baby and when giving her a bath so that the baby would know what activity was going to take place.

One day I caught her attention by reading out to her two pages of Jeffery Archer and another time from A Woman of Substance. I read out good passages in a tone as if I was reading to her Cinderella! Ofcourse later on she got bored and was more interested in tearing those books apart. :p

Then I invented this game in which I'd hide behind a cushion and ask "Maushi kahan hai?" and then I'd pop out from different sides everytime which kept Mandavi guessing and had her in splits.

The crowning glory of the second week of this trip was when we discovered that Mandavi had got two teeth on the lower side. They looked so cute and we felt immensely proud of her. My sister showered kisses on her and I told the news to all my friends. The sad part was that as a result of teething she was in a lot of pain. There were times when she cried a lot because of it. But we managed to keep her distracted mostly and when we couldn't Daddy would play this Korean music cd which was sure shot way of making her drowsy.

I took three days off from Wednesday to Friday which combined with the weekend gave me full 5 days at home. In the absence of any more disturbances and with Mandavi getting used to us time went smoothly. I will never forget how surprised I was to find her fall asleep on her own like a grown up while lying besides me. I always felt I had achieved something big when on a few occassions I managed to put her to sleep while carrying her around. It felt incredible watching her in my arms. I will always remember how when in her element Mandavi would make a lot of sounds as if she was talking to us. Once she practically gave us a lecture through her vocabulary of aaa's, laaaa's and eeee's. When she would be upset she would use the same words but with anger to register what my sister called "her complaint report".

Thanks to Mandavi's antics time just flew and soon 1 July arrived, the day Mandavi and my sister were to leave for Bangalore. I was forced to say bye to them an hour or two earlier than Daddy because I had to go to work. It felt funny to return home that day and not find my Sweet Cheery there. I realized then that my sister had been right in saying how these days that we spent with Mandavi would never come again. The fact is that our Kukubara will not be like this 5 month old baby again. Soon she'll be turning 6 months and by the time I'll know she would have become a year old. The best part is that each of these stages will come with there own new experiences and I am looking forward to that happening.

Patient timing

I woke up about 40 min back and as I was making my bed tea still half asleep I ended up complaining:

"I seem to be running out of patience for two kinds of things.
Those which I can't wait for to end.
And those which I just can't to wait to start."

This quote obviously had nothing to do with my act of making tea. It was a result of the dream that I had just before getting up. The dream I am going to keep a secret. What I will reveal is that I suddenly found myself wide awake as I started thinking a little bit more about my pronouncement.

If there were only two such types of events in my life then I would be happy with the rate at which time has been running for me. But it was only yesterday when I asked a friend of mine whether there was some way I could slow it down. Which means there are other situations belonging to a third category that are also occurring. These are the ones which require a long spell in order to work out in the end and thus are the ones which test our patience.

I guess a solution to my woes would be if I could work in two different time zones - slow and fast. Then by going back and forth I could make the things for which I had no restraint happen quickly without having to wait for the long drawn out periods to get over first.

A matter of time

There is a lady whom I meet pretty often at the NCL bus stop in the evenings. Since we stay in the same locality and so if our timings match we end up taking the same bus or sharing a rick home. Whenever we part ways on reaching our destination she has one dialogue "Chalo, ek aur din khatam ho gaya." meaning another day has gone by. She says this with great relief.

Much to my alarm, I seem to be counting time in units of months as if the year 2008 is just slipping away without knowing. As if it was 1st of Jan yesterday and we were all joking about new year resolutions and within a span of 24 hours today May has come months in advance.

Is it just me for whom time is flying? I hope I am not alone in the boat. I'd be happier with some company.

IIT Bombay lingo

During my nearly three year stay at IIT Bombay I heard many a slang phrases. Some of those words stayed with me and I still happen to use them in my everyday lingo. My favourites are:

Ab chamka!!??
When you have been trying to understand something for a long time and after many failed attempts you finally get it, then you exclaim with jubilation "ab chamka or "chamak gaya".

Bahut nabad ho raha hai!!!
This is what you'll find yourself saying when you are in grave and extreme tension specially a few hours before quiz or exam time. Nabad is nothing but NBD which is short for Nervous BreakDown.

Maaroing nightouts.
This is rather self explanatory. It stands for burning not just the midnight oil but the all-night oil. Everybody in IIT Bombay has on at least one occasion given an exam without having slept a wink the night before.

Kya fart hai!!!!!
This phrase is used whenever something bugging, that irritates you to the core, happens. The computer that I have been sitting on has been troubling me since morning and hence I have been saying this again and again all day long, though only in my head to avoid embarrassment. A milder and less shocking version would have been "kya bakwaas hai!!"

Daya!!
This is how you respond when (i) a person says anything far fetched, (b) something beyond imagination happens and its just too much for you, or (c) when you want someone to stop rambling. The number of extra a's and exclamation marks added in the end whether in writing or in sound is indicative of the length, breadth and depth of the atrocity being inflicted on you.

Baby talk

I may have been relegated to the position of Maushi 8 weeks back but I got to get a taste of the tasks that come with it only last to last weekend. I was in Bangalore for a few days during which I got a chance to give company to my then 7 week old niece Mandavi.

Mandavi has turned out to be a morning person much to my father's delight and he has been telling everyone that they have similar waking up timings. So during our stay every morning between 6 and 7 she would be handed over to Daddy and me. On some occasions she would be active, on some lethargic and on still others she would fall asleep cosily in Daddy's arms. Any discomfort caused because of a slight movement or a noise like opening of doors would be met with disapproval.

The one question that has always kept me wondering is "how to talk to babies?" Thats why the first few days Mandavi would inevitably get bored in my company. But then my sister gave me a book to read and on Monday evening I took ideas from it and managed to keep my niece's attention for 45 minutes! It was a big achievement to get her to excited enough not to miss her parents absence who taking advantage of the situation could eat dinner together. Once during the maushi-niece session Daddy came and tried talking to Mandavi but she completely ignored him! It turned out that my success wasn't a fluke. I gave a repeat performance the morning we were leaving for Pune.

Here are a few tips for the novices:
1. Always call the baby by his/her name.
2. Address yourself by a particular relation, for example, Mummy, Daddy, Maushi, Ajoba, etc instead of using "I".
3. Every time you recite a nursery rhyme or poem use actions. Remember twinkle twinkle little star and machli jal ki raani hai?
4. If you are seeing the baby after a long break you can describe what all things you did during that duration. Like I told Mandavi about where I had gone, what all the shopping I'd done, what were the colours of the clothes I'd bought and what I ate for lunch. :p
5. You can tell the baby stories. Since I couldn't remember the old tales I told my niece about "Finding Nemo".
6. You can ask questions to babies and give them some time to respond assuming they have started making sounds. "What is baby going to do today?" "What does baby want to eat?" "What should Mummy cook today-baigan or bhindi?" "Should Daddy go to office?" are some examples.

I have to admit that my niece was so taken by all that I was talking that she was excitedly kicking her legs. By the end of my nonstop chatter, she was at the peak of her energy while I was completely drained. My sister finally took possession for her and I got to have a well deserved dinner.

As I watched my sister and brother-in-law take care of my niece and not just for 45 min but every minute of the day, it instilled in me a greater respect for all parents. I can now picture what all my own parents must have done for me back when I was like Mandavi and so can't help but love them even more today.

I am no longer the youngest!

This is how my elder sister declared I would be beginning my latest post. She was right on target because that is exactly what I had thought when I saw our little one. On the night of 19 January I was gifted with a niece and was simultaneously overthrown from my position of being the youngest in the family.

It was just like the movies. Daddy and I arrived at the hospital just minutes before my sister was to be taken to the OT. I managed to wish her best of luck. I refrained from holding her hands because mine were so cold out of nervousness. As she was taken inside the OT we all waited with bated breath. Some 30-40 minutes later my brother-in-law (BIL) was sent by the doctors to buy some medicines. While he was away Daddy and I heard cries of a baby and we exclaimed that this must surely be our baby. Then the doctor called Daddy and informed him that the baby was a girl and both she and the mother were doing fine. What a relief it was to hear those words!

After this we shifted base to a room in the private ward. Sometime later Ulka was brought in on a stretcher. I noticed a chaadar kept untidily besides her. I was about to put it aside when suddenly the nurse picked it up carefully. Wrapped in it was to my utter surprise my niece!! As I set my eyes up on her for the first time I was filled with an immense joy. I had never seen anything so sweet. She looked so tiny and fragile that I instinctively felt like protecting her. At the same time I was too afraid of picking her up. In fact it was only on the sixth day that I got the courage of holding her in my lap.

The next few days were such a delight just watching the baby. All she did was sleep and feed. Once in a while she would open her eyes, look around and then as if bored with the scenery would doze of again. What efforts once we (my sister, BIL and I) made to wake her up as it was feeding time. We tickled her, moved her hands, cycled her legs, talked to her first sweetly and then sternly but to no avail. Finally we left her aside ignoring her and thats when the baby woke up crying loudly. Then another day baby decided to wake on her own. Moments before that she stretched herself completely which now according to the latest update has become her characteristic. While sleeping she loves to take her hands out of the blanket she is bundled in. There is this very cute photograph of hers in which she is asleep with her hand right below her chin. And another in which the blanket is thrown on one side, her legs are crossed on another side and hands are stretched up... what bliss!

The two questions that were raised since the baby arrived were who does she look like and what name will she be given. As far as the first question is concerned the baby seems to have taken after her father. But people say that her features may change as she will grow up. My sister and BIL took some days to finally decide on a consensus name for the baby. We were told that they were going to call her Mandavi, after the river that flows in Goa. We are pretty sure that the baby will be able to carry this name which one day will probably get shortened to the more stylish Mandy by her friends.

Lots of Daddy's relatives and colleagues told him that his perspective to life will change on becoming a grandfather. But its really me who is feeling somewhat different. Not surprising because I had never seen that small a baby at such close quarters before. Its unbelievable the emotions that I never knew existed were stirred inside me thanks to the small wonder. I suddenly want to do everything good and right otherwise what will Mandavi think of me. I have to behave as a "responsible maushi" from now on.

:)