Tuesday, January 01, 2013
My last post here
In a bid to find myself as a writer again I am beginning a new blog titled "Write around the corner". I hope to see you then hereafter on www.maarkmywords.blogspot.com.
Thursday, January 05, 2012
New year
Over time relationships undergo a transformation. With some people we become increasingly comfortable, familiarity smooths the initial kinks, and the connection strengthens. In other cases those who once held prime importance for us, fade out of our lives at a later stage. This disappearance could be simply a derivative of our busyness or a shift of priorities. In rare instances the decision to keep away is even intentional.
Whatever the reason for the distance, we may occasionally look back, ponder over how it happened and even try to bridge the gap. However, any such attempt would be fruitless if the desire to restore things to former glory isn't mutual.
In Hindi there is a saying: taali ek haath se nahi bajti (you cannot clap with just one hand). It takes two to tango. So is the case with maintaining ties in their true spirit. The effort has to come from both sides.
If the person in front is unwilling to reach for your outstretched hand and has closed his/her heart, then what can be done? You come out feeling foolish and worse still, deeply saddened.
Not only is it a happy chance to be able to keep loving a changed person, but to have them continue to love you back.
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Tuesday, November 01, 2011
My first year in Uppsala
My Arrival in Uppsala had not been an easy one. This had nothing to do with my flights, but with the long time it took to receive my new passport as Police Verification traversed three cities: Chennai, Pune and Delhi. When I finally managed to get it in hand I immediately applied for a Swedish Work Permit. Though the decision came in my inbox within three weeks it took some days to get it stamped on my passport as it had to be sent to Delhi. My woes did not end and the passport mailed through a courier service met with a further delay. It was a near photo finish as I eventually got hold of my prized possession with only the weekend to spare before my departure. The two days were precious as packing efficiently was key without any extra baggage allowance.
Settling in Uppsala was easy thanks to some acquaintances I had made while I was still in Chennai. They showed me the ropes and I was soon on my own. The fact that a change of events had led me to be a part of the research group I would have wanted to in an ideal situation cheered me. The cold weather in some inexplicable way warmed my heart towards the city and I felt at home without which I would have found it difficult to live alone for a long stretch of time. This besides, preparing for someone's arrival during Christmas holidays for three weeks added to the excitement.
Partings and meetings with my husband happened every few months whenever he had a break before the start of a new course semester. It was the time in between that was a test for both of us. Barring the few occasions requiring a complaint report, we did our best to not be demanding. What was important was to keep each other abreast of our daily lives which had got separated having to reside in two different countries. Even in absence the other person's presence was made to feel, the knowledge of which brought in a sense of security.
Temperature monitoring was of supreme importance throughout the winter season which lasted until March end. I remember returning from UK then to be welcomed by the sight of vanished snow. I was fascinated to see that even after weathering terrible conditions the grass grew, the trees got their leaves back and flowers bloomed all around on their own when summer arrived. I don't think I have ever appreciated nature and its beauty in this manner before.
Drawing comparisons with conditions back home happened inevitably. Consider something as basic as a bus ride. I still feel horrified recalling my 15-20 min journeys from home in Pune to NCL and back during my PhD. The buses would always be extremely crowded in the morning with everyone going towards the city for work and I had to fight my way through the length of the bus to reach the exit when my stop came at the cost of mercilessly stepping on people's toes. The evenings were no different with people returning home. Worse still some buses wouldn't stop requiring me to wait for another 45 minutes for the next round.
Commuting within Uppsala and around is really smooth. The buses are mostly on schedule and if delayed then only by a few minutes. A combined timetable for all the buses is freely distributed. On the ul.se site you can even type in your starting point and destination to find out which buses can be boarded at a given time. The heavy traffic and high population in India are perhaps deterrents for implementation of such a disciplined scheme.
You never hear about deaths due to cold even when temperatures dip much more than say in New Delhi (-20 deg C vs 4 deg C). Stricken with poverty people in India sleep on the roads and huddle themselves around small bonfires to keep warm while some families live in tents with little to protect. Homes, offices, and public transport have excellent heating systems and its as good as 20-25 deg C inside there confines.
What I miss is the excitement and furor revolving around various events happening in my motherland. For instance, our Indian Cricket Team bringing home the World Cup after a long wait. The support and fasting along with Team Anna. The debating over the various scams. The dandias at Navratri. The firecrackers at Diwali. The release of the 160 crore Ra.One. I miss even the crowds and the hustle-bustle.
Any differences from this time last year? We can do without wearing woolen gloves and caps. Much to my surprise the temperature is yet to drop below zero deg C. I am almost wishing for it to snow but mostly sunny days have been forecast for the next fortnight. A major change is I am back with my husband and happy days are here again. (*crossing my fingers*)
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PS: How was your first year or for that matter trip of any length outside your home country? Was the transition easy? For those who have been away for longer how does it feel now?
Saturday, July 23, 2011
Serious reading (1)
While the parents are battling it out in court, the children are adjusting to the new man in their lives. Arjun is taken by Ashok’s bold nature and man-to-man bonding as opposed to his father's overbearing attitude. He agrees to the idea of being sent to a boarding school in Dehradun as a means for toughening up. At the same time Ashok gets an offer to work in the US. Shagun agrees to give up custody of the children so that she can marry him and go along. Raman also settles for divorce.
Wednesday, July 20, 2011
Chic-lit (1)
Sunday, July 17, 2011
Agatha Christie’s murder mysteries (1)
Friday, June 24, 2011
Beautiful words in English (2)
1. Perseverance

2. Patience

Tuesday, June 14, 2011
Skarholmen, Uppsala
I had been under the belief that Uppsala is a city surrounded by land. So finding a huge waterbody was a big surprise. Skarholmen is a harbor. A part of it meanders and actually connects to Stockholm.


There was a long stretch of water. The water itself was glistening in the summer sun. We saw many private boats parked there. Closeby was also a mini beach. Many people were sunbathing. Girls and boys were swimming. Kids were playing under the watchful eyes of their parents. Couples were strolling with babies in prams.
Watching the beauty relaxed me. That there was such a place so easily accessible made me feel wonderful. To me suddenly Uppsala stopped seeming small.
Skarholmen gave a form to the phrase of "expanding your horizon."
Here are some photos that I took that day.


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PS: Like it was for me, did something surprise you about the city you are living in and made it more likeable for you?
Monday, June 06, 2011
In your dreams

99.9% of times I see dreams when I sleep. My constant complaint is that on waking up in the morning I feel as if I have been working all night.
The usual setting for my dreams is my school building or playground, my IIT Bombay hostel and home in India. Those making appearances in my dreams include family, friends, colleagues from work, people I haven't seen or thought about for years, random unknown faces, and even film or soap actors. The latter invariably happens over weekends as a result of my being glued to the tv for too long.
I had one of my scariest dreams just a few days before the Class X Board Exams were going to take place. I saw all my teeth crumbling into tiny pieces and when I covered my mouth they fell into my palms! One early morning in January
2009 in a rare happening I woke up crying continuing the flow of tears from the dream. Months after I had successfully given my Ph.D. viva I found myself floundering at answering the questions posed by the committee in my nightmare.
Such visions can easily be attributed to my fears and insecurities during those periods. But what about the cases when I see myself doing things I am incapable of doing (as of this moment) in life. For example, I do not know how to cycle. I do not know how to ride a scooty. I had learnt driving a car once up on a time but lost the confidence on Pune roads and no longer remember now even the order of accelerator, brake and clutch. I do not know how to swim. I definitely am no Krrish. Yet in my nightly illusions I just pick up a cycle or get on a bike and am able to balance it without any issues. I find myself having fun floating in those Waterworld kind of pools. On other occasions I see myself riding on huge waves. Once I got inside what was in the beginning a plane and later turned into a spherical capsule but really enormous. The way it traveled was very much like this scene in the animation movie Robots when Rodney arrives in Robot City and goes to meet his idol Bigweld. A few days back I was flying around from one part of the school field to another. It was as if I had gained some superpowers.
As much as I'd like to have a relaxed slumber, these particular action packed specters of the mind-boggling type tell me that if only we believe then like in our dreams in our daily affairs too we would be able to do things above and beyond what me may normally percieve ourselves to be capable of.
So dream on.
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PS: What kind of dreams do you have?
Tuesday, May 24, 2011
Slam bam

Any MBA student will tell you of their grueling work schedule. I had a fair share of the experience during M.Sc. Chemistry at IIT Bombay long ago in 2001-2003. Every semester we gave two sets of exams - one in the middle and the other at the end. Interspersed between these would be quizzes and written assignments for every subject. In the senior year in preparation for the research life ahead the professors as part of their courses had us looking through literature in journals, write reports on the findings and even make presentations.
Clearly then along with the students, the faculty also have their work cut out and need to do more than simply using the chalk and blackboard in order to maintain standards. Doing good research requires you to keep abreast with the latest developments in your field, to be quick enough to ride on the tide and to build a solid niche for your work amidst that.
Maintaining a balance between being a good teacher and a quality researcher becomes a matter of being passionate about what you do and managing it well. Discussing new findings appearing in journals with students and colleagues enables to identify the possibilities therein for you. Engaging the senior students in mentoring the younger lot can help in taking some of the load off.
We now have a total of 16 IITs and in addition there are six IISERs. Until a year back some of the professors from University of Pune and scientists from NCL were roped in for taking classes at IISER, Pune besides performing their regular duties. Due to shortage of competent faculty the existing staff has to perhaps bite more than they can chew. There is a need to bring in more hands for the job.
I feel the general perception that doing science and making money do not go together should be changed. Eyebrows should not be raised when professors call for higher pay scales. Giving encouragement, incentives and rewards wherever due would make the demanding job lucrative and go a long way in luring back more and more lost talent.
DPS Mathura Road where I schooled which had started off in tents eventually became one of the largest schools in Delhi where you had classes from Nursery to XII and each class having 6-9 sections. This was possible only because the architects were able to envision the great future despite the humble beginnings. The huge Angstrom Laboratory where I am currently working is relatively new and first opened its doors a few years back only. Similarly our newer universities and institutes should be built while keeping the imminent progress in mind. The older ones should be timely upgraded and an improvement in the working conditions should be brought about.
As much as world class students deserve world class professors, the world class professors need world class facilities to motivate them to do better still.
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PS: What is your take? Are our professors as bad as the Minister thinks?
Saturday, May 07, 2011
The Man of My Dreams
I recently read the book The Man of My Dreams by Curtis Sittenfeld. The story begins in June 1991 when Hannah at the age of 14 years old sees her parents separate. As she grows older she meets three men. There is Mike who truly loves her but she doesn’t find a soul mate in him. Then we have the handsome Oliver who gives her attention and much more but has a roving eye. Finally there is Henry for whom Hannah has held a torch for years. She moves to Chicago to be near him only to learn he has a girlfriend. They begin to spend unusual times together, acknowledge their once up on a time crush for each other and recognize the “weird thing” happening between them. But ultimately their relationship doesn't move any further and this is the closest Hannah comes to finding the man of her dreams.When Henry steers towards Suzy, a heartbroken Hannah goes to New Mexico where she learns to live again. With some soul searching, she is able to confront the demons of her childhood that have always held her back. Nearly two years later one day in May 2005 she writes a letter to her therapist telling her the lessons learned.
Here are a few of the lines Hannah says in those pages and my comments (in italics):
"Perhaps this is how you know you're doing the thing you're intended to do: No matter how slow or slight your progress, you never feel that it's a waste of time.”
*When looking at other people’s lives and success, in a moment of weakness we tend to question our own worth. I feel in such a situation we should think like Hannah to strengthen our belief in what we do.*
“I wanted to hold happiness in reserve, like a bottle of champagne. I postponed it because I was afraid, because I overvalued it, because I didn’t want to use it up, because what do you wish for then? The possibility, that I was intimidated by getting what I wanted, is the hardest one for me to consider, which might mean it is the likeliest.”
*It is indeed our fears that tie us down and make us hesitate when all we needed to do was take a leap of faith.*
“I don’t mean this to be glib,” Hannah continues, “but I feel like a lot of life is distasteful and embarrassing. And you just push through it. Isn’t that the big lesson we learned from living with Dad? You fix what you can, and you let time pass.”
*It is hard to wait for time do its magic but mostly it does work.*
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PS: Would like to share any quote from a book that stayed back with you?
Monday, May 02, 2011
Winter wonderland
In late October, 2010 when I arrived in Uppsala the temperatures were close to -2 to -4 deg C. I could already spot frost forming over leaves. I was also told that the conditions were just right for a snowfall and that it could happen any day. On 9th November I was taking some prints when I just chanced to look out of the window. Lo and behold what I see are tiny flakes falling down from the sky. As it was a light snowfall there was a dreamlike quality to it and I stood there entranced. A few hours down the line when it still continued it managed to bring everything in its fold.
Watching snowfall from the inside is one thing and braving it outside another. It caused the (only) breakdown of the bus service. I had to wait at the stop for an unusual 1.5 hours that evening. In between the cold and snow was so difficult to bear that I went back to my office building to keep myself warm. But even with the discomfort I still felt a surge of excitement while walking over fresh snow. The very next morning was a beautiful sight. I realized that it had snowed all night and there was a thick layering all around. The snow on top of the bushes reminded me of icing on a cake. My first ever snowfall was beyond my expectations.


A few days later I was in for stunning rare views. I guess because of the very low temperature all the trees and bushes had frozen which gave every place I swept my eyes a mystic quality. I had never seen anything like it before. During the next few months I saw the magic repeat only once more.


Over time -18 deg C became a standard. In a break from this for a couple of days it was 0 deg C and everybody joked about how hot it was and that summer had come. In contrast on one occasion the temperature took such a dip that the water coming out of my eyes froze. I could sense the inside of my nose solidifying.

Through most of the winter the real challenge for me was to train my brain into not thinking that pitch darkness at 3 pm was night and time to go to bed. It wasn’t that difficult to combat the cold. The reason was the excellent heating system in not just the houses but also the offices, food stores and even the buses. I would only be exposed to the icy weather when standing at the bus stops and during the short walk from home to the supermarket. I came to observe that management of the snow on the roads was extremely good in Uppsala as a result of which the buses were rarely late. All I had to do was be on time at the bus stop according to the schedule.

I think I fairly enjoyed my “real” winter experience. October to March is not an extremely long time. But not getting to see the sun, having to wear heavy gear every day and being extremely careful of the ice on the road when walking to avoid slipping eventually did take its toll. The good thing is it has made me appreciate the brightness, greenery and colorful flowers that the summer has brought. See the photos below and you'll know that it truly is so.



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PS: How was your winter experience? Has summer started for you?
Thursday, April 21, 2011
UK trip (3): Leicester flashback
24 March saw us finding our way to the New Street station, Birmingham. We had booked our tickets in advance. The train was on time and in less than an hour's ride we were at Leicester. When we came out of the station the sun was greeting us. The weather was glorious and it made our walking expedition enjoyable.
From the Leicester station the University of Leicester was not too far. Opposite to it was the De Montfort University. Along the way we passed by the Victoria Park. Instead of turning inside we went straight ahead to the Main Building. From there we went past the Library to the Engineering Department. We explored the building and we went to see the lab where my husband had spent considerable time for his Masters' project work. Sadly, his supervisor wasn't around and we could not meet him.

Next we had another walk to the Freemen's Common, the university accommodation where my husband had stayed during 2004-2005. We returned to the main campus via the Queen Elisabeth College which is also a part of the university. We followed this by a walk through the Victoria Park to go back towards the station for having lunch. It was nearing 1.20 pm and I was informed that in Leicester restaurants close by 2 pm. I only believed it when I actually saw the scene. Luckily we managed to find one open but were told to hurry up. An instant order of mutton biryani was made which turned out to be such a tasty choice that it was reordered.

Feeling a lot better after eating good food we made our way to the city center. We rested from time to time taking in the scene and talking about my husband's old days in Leicester. We roamed around a lot in a nearby mall. We made a stop over at one place to have coffee. Evening was approaching and we had a train to catch. So again we got onto our feet.
We were quietly walking when suddenly we heard a loud cheering noise coming from a bar. A big screen was showing the last moments of the World Cup Cricket's quarterfinal match between India and Australia. It was touted as a tough one to crack for India and many had predicted an end to our journey ahead. Watching Yuvraj Singh play the last winning shot thrilled u
s and we joined in the celebrations for some minutes.There was still enough time remaining for our train's arrival and it was decided to put to use by... walking. I would have complained but I spotted the famous plain red telephone booths associated with UK. I had been looking for them in London but always found them with ads printed. So immediately husband was asked to take my photos with the booth.
That done we went inside the station. Soon we boarded the train and headed back to camp.
Saturday, April 16, 2011
UK trip (2): Art work
(1) I struggled in the morning to even get a decent rough outline. By noon all I had on paper was:
(2) After a good lunch and a chat with my father, I felt energized to begin adding details. I tackled the left side first. By 5 pm this is what I got:
(3) I then treated myself to a much deserved snack and shifted my focus to the right side of the outline. By 6.30 pm I could see some improvement:
(4) I nearly thought of leaving the rest for Sunday but listening to some peppy music changed my mood. Feeling uplifted I again picked up my pencil. By the time I was done it was 8.40 pm.
(5) At the end of the day this is how my sketch compared with the photo on I based it:
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PS: How did you find it? Is there a good resemblance? Did I do well?








